CGL Internet Cafe
by BoySexWriter
Summary: What if there were internet access at Camp Green Lake? Contains slash.
1. Chapter One

Roses are red, violets are blue - me no own, so you no sue.

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At The Camp Green Lake Internet Cafe

_Squid is in the cafe, using one of the PCs and chewing his fingernails. ZigZag is using another PC on the other side of the room. The rest of the D-Boys are outside. Squid's mouth falls open._

**Squid:** Hey, Zig, get over here!!

**Ziggy:** What?

**Squid:** Take a look at this.

_They are looking at this very website, this very fandom!!_

**Ziggy:** Fan.... fiction?? Stories about.... us??

**Squid:** Seems so.

**Ziggy:** Weeird............ _He leans over Squid's shoulder, peering at the screen._

**Squid:** Do you mind?? There are nine other PCs in here which aren't being used, go look at some yourself.

_ZigZag shrugs and takes the PC next to Squid._

**Squid:** Zig............ c'mere!!

**Ziggy:** You just told me............ he sees the look on Squid's face What?

_He leans over and reads the line Squid is pointing at. It says, 'and then their lips met in a perfect kiss'._

**Ziggy:** What? Who kissed?

**Squid:** Us!!

**Ziggy:** What?? Gross!!

**Squid:** Look, there's loads more on this site. _The site is Holes SlashFiction Archive._

_The rest of the D-Boys enter._

**Armpit:** What's all the yellin' for dawg??

_Squid and Ziggy are both staring open mouthed at all the fanfics onscreen. The rest of the D-Boys do their best to get a look at what has shocked them so._

**Caveman:** Right, I'm looking at that website right now!! _He sits down at a computer._

**X-Ray:** Click on that one!!_ He points at a Armpit/X-Ray fic_.

**Squid:** No!! I don't wanna see that!!

_The rest of them have found their ways to a computer and are looking at the fics._

**Magnet:** They know all this would never happen, right??

Ziggy: I don't know, some of it could............. come take a look!!

_Squid:_ Why is there so much about you and me, Zig?

_Ziggy shrugs. The rest of the boys are making disgusted noises._

**Armpit:** Caveman, what are you looking at??

**Caveman:** Uhm............ I............ need to use the bathroom. Yeah. The bathroom. Back in a minute.

_He shuffles out of the room doing his best to cover a certain area._

**Magnet:** What in blue hell was he looking at that made him............?

**Armpit:** _He is looking at what Caveman was looking at_. Man, you don't wanna know. You REALLY don't wanna know.

**Magnet:** Did someone pair him with some gorgeous blonde??

**Armpit:** No dawg it's only about us. No girls here.

**Magnet:** That sucks.

_Squid is back looking at the fanfics on here._

**Squid:** Man, why do these crazy people keep pairing me off with girls??

**Ziggy:** Coz you're hot, right. _Puts on a girly voice._ Ooh Alan, you're so sexy!!

**Squid:** Shut the fuck up before I.....

_Caveman is back._

**Zero:** _Tapping his screen_. Now you see Stanley, I would never do that to you....

_Caveman wanders over to what Zero is looking at. It is the same fic which caused him to, uh, leave the room in such a hurry._

**Caveman:** No but I might just do THAT. _He taps the screen._

**Zero:** You already did, remember............

_Caveman clamps his hand over Zero's mouth._

**Caveman:** Shuddup!!

**Zero:** And then I did THAT!! _Points to screen._

**Caveman:** Just.... just.... just....

**Magnet:** Now this kinda thing, Ziggy, makes me look at you differently.

**Ziggy:** Yeah, me too. Maybe we should try..... that!!_ He stabs his finger at the screen._

**Magnet:** Maybe.

_They embrace warmly and kiss - with tongues._

**X-Ray:** Urgh, get a room, guys.

**Armpit:** This makes me look at _everyone_ differently. Including you, X............

**X-Ray:** Get away from me.

**_...TBC..._**

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Hope you found funny.


	2. Chapter Two

Roses are red, violets are blue - me no own, so you no sue!!

Must apologize for leading everyone into thinking there was a Holes Slashfiction Archive. There isn't. Well, not that I know of. Sorry.

* * *

At The Camp Green Lake Internet Cafe

Chapter Two

_The D-Boyz are still gaping at the computers. Magnet and Ziggy are standing in the middle of the room, holding eachother._

**X-Ray:** Hmm. Mr Sir and myself. I can't say I'm happy about that pairing. Who writes this pervy junk??

**Squid:** It's funny!!

**X-Ray:** No, it's NOT.

**Caveman:** It's hott....

_X-Ray shudders._

**Zero:** He's right you know..... _He places his hand on Caveman's knee._

**Caveman:** Remember this.... _He places his hand on Zero's knee._

**Zero:** That was –

**X-Ray:** Okay, a _little_ more than we need to know here, guys.

**Magnet:** Hey, I'm interested!!

**Squid:** Look!! These mad people have made CGL co-ed!!

**Mr Sir's voice floating in through the door:** We don't allow gel at Camp Green Lake.

**Squid:** Haha, in these ones we all get girls!!

**Magnet, Ziggy, Caveman, Zero:** GIRLS?!?!?!?! _They are quite, quite disgusted._

**Armpit:** Girls, hmmmm.

**Caveman:** Girls UUUUGGGGHHHH!!!

**Armpit:** _In a girly voice._ Ooh Stanley, come fuck me Stanley.

**Caveman:** Shut the hell up, man.

**Squid:** Look, I get to have sex with all these different girls. Oh man, this is so cool. Hey in this one I get to marry a chick!!

**Armpit:** Aw man how come I never get the girl??

**X-Ray:** I never get the girl neither.

**Armpit:** Maybe that's cos they think you're a man's man!!

**X-Ray:** Shuddup, man.

_Caveman, Zero, Ziggy and Magnet are still looking at the slash._

**Ziggy:** Oh my gawd, D-Tent gangbang!!

**X-Ray:** WHAT?!?!?! We should sue these crazy women!! What is it with them and making us all fuck eachother.

**Magnet:** Maybe it makes them hott.

_Armpit is dancing around the room, very hyper._

**X-Ray:** What the hell is wrong with you, man??

**Caveman:** He's hyper.

**Zero:** Sometimes it does that to you.

_X-Ray clicks on a box. The computer demands that he be over eighteen to continue reading. He clicks cancel._

**Caveman:** Ooh, shower fics!!

**Magnet:** Us in the SHOWER??

**Armpit:** Ha. It would seem that most of these girls have got it bad for li'l ol' Zero.

_Caveman puts an arm protectively round Zero's shoulders._

**Caveman:** They do know he's mine, don't they??

**Armpit:** Some do. Come look at this!! Hey X, sure you don't wanna try any of this??

**X-Ray:** Shut the fuck up before I come over there and smack you.

**Armpit:** Oh come on, it could be fun.

**X-Ray:** That's it!! _He jokily marches over and wrestles Armpit to the ground._

_Everyone is looking at them in a tangled mess on the floor._

**Everyone:** Get a room!!

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Hope you found second chapter funny.


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